Very important: this article is not for those strong and determined women who are used to and intend to continue to solve all their problems on their own. And not for those who doubt the ethics of marriage of convenience. Not for feminists. And not even for Turgenev’s girls who believe that love is rock, and marriages are made in heaven. This article is for ordinary girls who just want to get married. In fact, there is nothing reprehensible in this desire. And nothing complicated.
If you are not going to get married, but just want to gain experience in a relationship or live a certain (or uncertain) part of your life with pleasure, then you can get acquainted and meet someone you like. But remember that many young people do not intend to marry anyone at all and never (or, at least, in the next 10 years).
If you are planning a marriage in the short term, then there are men who are best avoided. Pay attention to the following negative markers:
· Bright sports car. This guy intends for a long time to produce a wow effect on all the girls in the world, and not just on you. · Hipster style. Freedom is their cult. Including freedom from family obligations. In addition, he is likely to choose a girl “by style”, and not “for life”. · A man prefers extreme or solitary sports (for example, surfing or snowboarding). He is passionate about himself, and family is a team.
From dating to first date
Do not call, write to messengers, do not comment on his status in social networks and do not appear at all. If the man did not call within 4 days, then you need to forget about him. You are not interested in him.
If a man called and made an appointment for tomorrow, refuse in a polite form: “I already have plans (even if they are not), but I will be happy to see you next weekend.” Let him know that you have your own interesting and active life, you do not sit alone, but also do not reject it. If you are really interested in him, then the next time he will invite you in advance.
Who pays on the first date? Don’t even ask yourself this question! A man always pays (unless, of course, you plan to live with him, and not just have dinner). If a man himself offers to pay the bill in half, then this is good ground for thought. Why do you need a husband who is not able to pay a portion of salad? If he is not ready to do anything for you at the first steps of the relationship, then in the future you will have to shoulder the whole burden of household and, possibly, financial problems of the family.
Do not even look into the bill – not on the first date, or on the third, or on the tenth anniversary of a legal marriage: a man decides financial matters himself. He’ll be able to handle the food bill!
Should I have sex after my first date? Not! Relations can continue if there was sex on a first date, but the chance that they will lead to marriage is one in a million. There are couples who live in a civil marriage … And it is unlikely that he will become official: a man will not marry a woman, to the location of which he did not make any effort. There are exceptions, but there are so few that it’s not worth the risk.
Between first and second
More difficult. Men today are afraid of accusations of harassment and harassment, so they do not dare to insist on the continuation of the novel, without receiving explicit approval from the woman. Do not overdo it: you can indicate that you wouldn’t be against a new meeting, but a man calls, invites, and always appoints a place.
Women with an active life position “I decide” and “I act”, of course, can quickly get married: they decide, they tell the man, they will register the marriage. And all further decisions will also be taken by all for life for two … Will this suit you?
After the first date, sex is not allowed. And after the second? Perhaps, too. The second date is a good reason to calculate whether this respected person suits you as lovers.
As an option – you can learn to visually calculate the sexual constitution. But by and large, what a man is at the table, such is he in bed. There are gourmets who relish every bite. And there are people who are used to swallowing everything, and they do not care what they are. There are brutal predators tearing steaks with their teeth … Even decisiveness when choosing a dish more or less correlates with activity in sex.
Very important : your first sex should not happen in your territory! Even if a man does not have his own corner, let him rent a hotel room or beg for an apartment from friends. If your lover did not lift a finger to organize everything for an intimate meeting, and he was presented with ready-made sex on a silver platter, then he goes into passivity. Not only in sex – in everything. From this very moment he knows that a woman will organize everything, the main thing is not to twitch. Marry – maybe. But you will be a man in a relationship.
From sex to marriage
A man has a desire to start a family with that woman with whom he is emotionally light. And it’s not about not burdening a man with his deeds and concerns. On the contrary: he always rushes to the woman’s help with pleasure and solves issues if the woman sees him as her protector and earner. A very sentimental and noble consideration leads to the thought of a real man’s marriage: “How could she be without me?”